I completely identify with Renee Zellweger's character in Jerry McGuire, when she told her sister that while her friends ar trying to find a man, keep a man, she was trying to raise a man. I feel you, sista.
I don't know how to find the right motivation button to press that will turn Hanan into the responsible, conscientious and hardworking man that I know he can be. Until then, I am left with the stubborn, careless pre-teen with a major chip on his shoulder.
I don't know how much of this is hormones. My colleague tried to convince me that boys are naturally lazy, but they will find a way to turn out alright later. I am hard-pressed to buy that. I am sure there are boys who are well-adjusted human beings who are also good with everyday tasks like schoolwork.
Maybe I should just rear fish.
If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him James 1:5
I guess I need to seek wisdom in this matter. Obviously, I don't know what I am doing or I will do it better.
Saturday, October 3
Saturday, September 19
How can 2 walk together, except they agree?
This has been the theme recently in almost all aspects of my life - work, marriage, motherhood, daughterhood and friendship.
Being with someone in any relationship will involve being in some kind of agreement about basic things as well as deep spiritual stuff. And when that doesn't exist, what you have is resentment, anger, strife and disappointment.
How to agree?
By being submissive to another's will - this is easier said that done for me. I am known for my mule-like stubborness.
By negotiating a "agree to disagree" scenario - not always ideal and can't have too many of these in a relationship.
Persuasive dialogue - talk someone around to see and accept your point of view (My personal favourite :) heh heh)
By building the basic foundation of the relationship together, so there are agreed upon values which will not flounder when the load on them gets too heavy at times.
I think God uses all of these to build a relationship with us. He submitted to death on the cross to remove the division between us, allowed us to give up some of his laws regarding diet, war and non-beleivers, talked to us through the gentle voice of Jesus Christ and then his disciples to help us see his view and put in place his commandments as a shared set of values for us to enjoy building His kingdom with him.
Agreeing with each other is not as impossible as it looks. As beleivers especially, half the work is already done for us.
Being with someone in any relationship will involve being in some kind of agreement about basic things as well as deep spiritual stuff. And when that doesn't exist, what you have is resentment, anger, strife and disappointment.
How to agree?
By being submissive to another's will - this is easier said that done for me. I am known for my mule-like stubborness.
By negotiating a "agree to disagree" scenario - not always ideal and can't have too many of these in a relationship.
Persuasive dialogue - talk someone around to see and accept your point of view (My personal favourite :) heh heh)
By building the basic foundation of the relationship together, so there are agreed upon values which will not flounder when the load on them gets too heavy at times.
I think God uses all of these to build a relationship with us. He submitted to death on the cross to remove the division between us, allowed us to give up some of his laws regarding diet, war and non-beleivers, talked to us through the gentle voice of Jesus Christ and then his disciples to help us see his view and put in place his commandments as a shared set of values for us to enjoy building His kingdom with him.
Agreeing with each other is not as impossible as it looks. As beleivers especially, half the work is already done for us.
Tuesday, September 15
What I learnt in the last 5 days
1) God is real.
2) He is my Champion.
3) He is always for me, and because he is, who can be against me?
4) He is my provider. Not my job, not my work, not my employer. He alone.
5) He protects me from the fowler's snare
6) I am fearfully and wonderfully made. And he plans to prosper me.
7) That every groan, every sigh reaches him.
8) That every injustice is recorded and vengeance is His and His alone.
9) The the world is a vale of tears, but God has called us into His own.
10) That I will no matter how broken I am, I still live in the house of the Lord.
2) He is my Champion.
3) He is always for me, and because he is, who can be against me?
4) He is my provider. Not my job, not my work, not my employer. He alone.
5) He protects me from the fowler's snare
6) I am fearfully and wonderfully made. And he plans to prosper me.
7) That every groan, every sigh reaches him.
8) That every injustice is recorded and vengeance is His and His alone.
9) The the world is a vale of tears, but God has called us into His own.
10) That I will no matter how broken I am, I still live in the house of the Lord.
Thursday, September 10
Random Update
It has been a few days since the end of hell week, where there were 4 major projects to complete. In the lull, I have been working on getting head screwed on right again, while preparing for the next wave of busyness, which is coming soon, I am sure.
Change is a recurring subject for this blog, because there is such alot of it in my life, I guess. Very soon, there will be changes at work, and I will trying to exact changes in my personal life as well. Limbo is not really my thing.
*****
Hanan's streaming exams are literally around the corner, and we have to get cracker-lacking! His Tamil is a big worry, not so much that he has to pass this exam, but rather, what if he does and can't handle it at P5 and PSLE? Am I needlessly torturing my child? While its fine to promote mother tongue education and all, there really should be other alternatives.
Sigh.
*****
Really looking forward to my trip to HK in Oct. This will my first time to this land that many people think Singapore is a part of. More than anything, I think I am looking forward to the break. From work, from home, from responsibilities and expectations. And also from the fair shores of Singapore, which I have not left since .... I can't remember when. The timing is a bit sucky, right before exam fever, but still...
*****
Went to watch The Proposal on Monday. Been ages since I saw a decent rom-com, so I really enjoyed it. Its amazing how Sandra Bullock still looks so hot. And the role suited her to a T, even though she doesn't really play strong woman characters. Go Sandra Bee! Ryan Reynolds is a bit of a hottie too, although I didn't exactly see a wide enough range of emotions in this movie to be able to tell anything about his acting ability.
*****
And that's it.
Change is a recurring subject for this blog, because there is such alot of it in my life, I guess. Very soon, there will be changes at work, and I will trying to exact changes in my personal life as well. Limbo is not really my thing.
*****
Hanan's streaming exams are literally around the corner, and we have to get cracker-lacking! His Tamil is a big worry, not so much that he has to pass this exam, but rather, what if he does and can't handle it at P5 and PSLE? Am I needlessly torturing my child? While its fine to promote mother tongue education and all, there really should be other alternatives.
Sigh.
*****
Really looking forward to my trip to HK in Oct. This will my first time to this land that many people think Singapore is a part of. More than anything, I think I am looking forward to the break. From work, from home, from responsibilities and expectations. And also from the fair shores of Singapore, which I have not left since .... I can't remember when. The timing is a bit sucky, right before exam fever, but still...
*****
Went to watch The Proposal on Monday. Been ages since I saw a decent rom-com, so I really enjoyed it. Its amazing how Sandra Bullock still looks so hot. And the role suited her to a T, even though she doesn't really play strong woman characters. Go Sandra Bee! Ryan Reynolds is a bit of a hottie too, although I didn't exactly see a wide enough range of emotions in this movie to be able to tell anything about his acting ability.
*****
And that's it.
Thursday, August 27
10 years
This day, ten years ago, at 9:27 am, my life changed.
I now had another person to take care of. Of me and yet independant of me. Mine and yet, not quite. Of more worth than silver of gold, and yet just a bundle of wrinkly flesh. And good lungs.
What people said:
- He is so perfect
- You are so blessed
- He is going to be a wonderful being
- He will bring you joys you didn't know about
What they didn't say
- You will never sleep again
- Your body will never get over it
- You will find out the most wonderful and most evil things about yourself
- You will feel sorrow about things that didn't matter before
They were right. But so were the unspoken words.
One thing I do know. I wouldn't change it for the world. He is my only arrow in my quiver, but he would be the one I want next to me, come what may.
He is my baby, my son, my kid, my joy, my trial and my greatest blessing.
Happy birthday son!
I now had another person to take care of. Of me and yet independant of me. Mine and yet, not quite. Of more worth than silver of gold, and yet just a bundle of wrinkly flesh. And good lungs.
What people said:
- He is so perfect
- You are so blessed
- He is going to be a wonderful being
- He will bring you joys you didn't know about
What they didn't say
- You will never sleep again
- Your body will never get over it
- You will find out the most wonderful and most evil things about yourself
- You will feel sorrow about things that didn't matter before
They were right. But so were the unspoken words.
One thing I do know. I wouldn't change it for the world. He is my only arrow in my quiver, but he would be the one I want next to me, come what may.
He is my baby, my son, my kid, my joy, my trial and my greatest blessing.
Happy birthday son!
Tuesday, August 25
My week in review
Its been a busy busy busy week and guess what? Next week will be even busier. On the one hand, I am just thankful that I am blessed with so much to do, so many to love and time to do it all. On the other, I am a little weary of the routine, of the sheer everydayness of it all and can't wait for a break!
Meanwhile here is my week in review
Monday
Company Dinner and Dance. Was super fun. Thanks J and A who babysat for me and allowed me this night. I won a hairdryer. Pictures here is the crazy marcom team. And Darth Vader. That's actually John, our designer, who was part of the org comm and hence got to be in costume, but not eat anything.
Tuesday
Earnest work on Annual Report begins. Stress
Wednesday
Meetings. meetings, meetings and more meetings. Most unproductive day of the week. But finding time is a skill that I am working on, so this was a good day to practise.
Thursday
Scramble like mad to complete the magazine. In a writing flurry, and in the midst of it panic about how I haven't written the script for the church anniversary yet.
Went to prayer meeting at night. First time in a long long while. Felt good.
Friday
..I'm in love. Hee. Not really. But it's a song. Ok, Friday was a usual work day, mad rush to finish stuff. Spent Friday night shopping with Hanan for an outfit to wear to ...
Sat
....Vimal's ROM party. Which was also super fun. The food was awesome and the company was great. It was small-ish, about 100 people in all. As usual, ours was the hecklers' table, and very noisy. It was great that we have so many friends and family in our circle who are such good singers. save money on entertainement.
Sunday
Lunch with J and V,their treat, God bless them. T came along too. Crystal Jade dim sum rocks! Ooh, and I ran into Shades from Ngee Ann Poly. He looked so grown up, so man - not like the boy I once knew. I promised to find him on facebook, but haven't done that yet.
Monday
Happy Birthday, Prashanth!!! My baby brother turns 31, which makes me feel even older. Its a shame he is so far away, but you know we love you, bro! And mummy's home from India. Two weeks without her is just too long. Also, Hanan's exan started. Ugh.
Which brings us to today!
See what I mean by blessed beyond belief?
Meanwhile here is my week in review
Monday
Company Dinner and Dance. Was super fun. Thanks J and A who babysat for me and allowed me this night. I won a hairdryer. Pictures here is the crazy marcom team. And Darth Vader. That's actually John, our designer, who was part of the org comm and hence got to be in costume, but not eat anything.
Tuesday
Earnest work on Annual Report begins. Stress
Wednesday
Meetings. meetings, meetings and more meetings. Most unproductive day of the week. But finding time is a skill that I am working on, so this was a good day to practise.
Thursday
Scramble like mad to complete the magazine. In a writing flurry, and in the midst of it panic about how I haven't written the script for the church anniversary yet.
Went to prayer meeting at night. First time in a long long while. Felt good.
Friday
..I'm in love. Hee. Not really. But it's a song. Ok, Friday was a usual work day, mad rush to finish stuff. Spent Friday night shopping with Hanan for an outfit to wear to ...
Sat
....Vimal's ROM party. Which was also super fun. The food was awesome and the company was great. It was small-ish, about 100 people in all. As usual, ours was the hecklers' table, and very noisy. It was great that we have so many friends and family in our circle who are such good singers. save money on entertainement.
Sunday
Lunch with J and V,their treat, God bless them. T came along too. Crystal Jade dim sum rocks! Ooh, and I ran into Shades from Ngee Ann Poly. He looked so grown up, so man - not like the boy I once knew. I promised to find him on facebook, but haven't done that yet.
Monday
Happy Birthday, Prashanth!!! My baby brother turns 31, which makes me feel even older. Its a shame he is so far away, but you know we love you, bro! And mummy's home from India. Two weeks without her is just too long. Also, Hanan's exan started. Ugh.
Which brings us to today!
See what I mean by blessed beyond belief?
Monday, August 10
Restaurant Review - KPO
Better than meeting up with friends I really enjoy is meeting them in a cool place like KPO, where the slate coloured walls, muted lighting and cosy low sofas made for great conversation.
It helped that for the first hour or so, we were just about the only ones there, the PH crowd only picking up after 1:30pm. Sad for the outlet, but yay for us.
After all the mixed reviews I read about the place on www.hungrygowhere.com, I knew that checking it out myself would be the only thing to do. So with two willing(or not) victims, that's just what we did.
KPO is right where that "philatelic" place is, the Killney Post Office, hence its moniker. I guess it must get pretty crowded at night with the yuppie crowd, but today is was a family brunch sorta vibe.
I had the all day breakfast aka the works. Scrambled eggs on ultra thick toast, nice fat sausage, generous side of bacon, hash browned potatoes for $15 was a pretty good deal to me. What was NOT a good deal was the miserable tiny cup of Earl Grey for $9 bucks. C'mon guys, if you are gonna charge that much, at least give us a pot, will ya?
R's Steak and eggs were pretty good too. The red wine reduction for the sauce was really yummy, flavoured with rosemary and delightfully fruity.
PKH's spring chicken was hardly more than chick sized. Served on mash, it was tasty enough, but the portion would hardly feed a bird.. ha ha. A little poultry cannibal humour there.
Nothing on the dessert side really appealed, so we went to TCC for some dark devotion instead.
On the whole, I liked KPO, next time might try some of the local fare. Someone at the next table was having Hokkien Mee and it smelt heavenly.
It helped that for the first hour or so, we were just about the only ones there, the PH crowd only picking up after 1:30pm. Sad for the outlet, but yay for us.
After all the mixed reviews I read about the place on www.hungrygowhere.com, I knew that checking it out myself would be the only thing to do. So with two willing(or not) victims, that's just what we did.
KPO is right where that "philatelic" place is, the Killney Post Office, hence its moniker. I guess it must get pretty crowded at night with the yuppie crowd, but today is was a family brunch sorta vibe.
I had the all day breakfast aka the works. Scrambled eggs on ultra thick toast, nice fat sausage, generous side of bacon, hash browned potatoes for $15 was a pretty good deal to me. What was NOT a good deal was the miserable tiny cup of Earl Grey for $9 bucks. C'mon guys, if you are gonna charge that much, at least give us a pot, will ya?
R's Steak and eggs were pretty good too. The red wine reduction for the sauce was really yummy, flavoured with rosemary and delightfully fruity.
PKH's spring chicken was hardly more than chick sized. Served on mash, it was tasty enough, but the portion would hardly feed a bird.. ha ha. A little poultry cannibal humour there.
Nothing on the dessert side really appealed, so we went to TCC for some dark devotion instead.
On the whole, I liked KPO, next time might try some of the local fare. Someone at the next table was having Hokkien Mee and it smelt heavenly.
Friday, August 7
Happy 44th Singapore
It will be National Day soon, and I am amazed at how many of my colleagues and friends don't seem to be excited about it at all. Most of them are planning weekend getaways, and basically trying to find places in Singapore that wont be affected by the parade logistics (i.e not downtown)
I am really looking forward to it. The parade, the national song medleys, the members of parliament filin in one by one. The commands in Malay, the guard of honour, the contingents behind them. The arrival of the Prime Minister, the look LKY and LHL exchange (always makes me wanna cry), the slow darkening of the sky.
The arrival of the President, the seeking of permission, the National Anthem (but this time I have just lost it and can hardly see the TV through my tears. The feu de joie (21 Gun salute), the flypast, the showcasing of our military prowess.
The parade inspection, the marchpast, my sigh of relief when the President can finally sit down.
The pledge. This year its gonna be an amazing thing, with everyone, all of singapore, taking the pledge together at 8:22pm. Kudos to the genius who came up with this.
And then, the show. The fireworks. And the end of another wonderful birthday.
Happy Birthday, old girl. We may complain, and moan and sigh with discontent, but we love ya. And will keep praying for ya.
I am really looking forward to it. The parade, the national song medleys, the members of parliament filin in one by one. The commands in Malay, the guard of honour, the contingents behind them. The arrival of the Prime Minister, the look LKY and LHL exchange (always makes me wanna cry), the slow darkening of the sky.
The arrival of the President, the seeking of permission, the National Anthem (but this time I have just lost it and can hardly see the TV through my tears. The feu de joie (21 Gun salute), the flypast, the showcasing of our military prowess.
The parade inspection, the marchpast, my sigh of relief when the President can finally sit down.
The pledge. This year its gonna be an amazing thing, with everyone, all of singapore, taking the pledge together at 8:22pm. Kudos to the genius who came up with this.
And then, the show. The fireworks. And the end of another wonderful birthday.
Happy Birthday, old girl. We may complain, and moan and sigh with discontent, but we love ya. And will keep praying for ya.
Monday, August 3
parenting
I need a manual. Really. The personality changes and emotional rollercoasters that my kid has been on lately, I have no idea how to deal with it. Are you supposed to hit puberty when you are 10?
I realise that while the mature kid in him listens to me reason it out, the petulant child whines and carries on. Over the weekend, we had a battle of wills a few times, until out of sheer exhasution, I did the unforgivable. I hit the kid.
He didn't cry, but the look of intense pain, fury and hurt he gave me was horrible and terrifying. Immediately, "What have you done?" razed through my brain.
I came clean, told my brother about it, and he took Hanan aside for some mano a mano counselling. And I am glad i could draw on his support for this.
But what if it happens again? And again? What if in frustration, Hanan says something to hurt me?
I need a manual.
***
I have a manual.
The bible is full of wisdom on how to raise a child.
Spare the rod, and spoil the child.
Do not provoke your child to anger.
Train a child in the way he should go.
Teach him God's commandments.
I haven't exactly been following the manual. It's time for a refresher. From the Refresher.
I realise that while the mature kid in him listens to me reason it out, the petulant child whines and carries on. Over the weekend, we had a battle of wills a few times, until out of sheer exhasution, I did the unforgivable. I hit the kid.
He didn't cry, but the look of intense pain, fury and hurt he gave me was horrible and terrifying. Immediately, "What have you done?" razed through my brain.
I came clean, told my brother about it, and he took Hanan aside for some mano a mano counselling. And I am glad i could draw on his support for this.
But what if it happens again? And again? What if in frustration, Hanan says something to hurt me?
I need a manual.
***
I have a manual.
The bible is full of wisdom on how to raise a child.
Spare the rod, and spoil the child.
Do not provoke your child to anger.
Train a child in the way he should go.
Teach him God's commandments.
I haven't exactly been following the manual. It's time for a refresher. From the Refresher.
Thursday, July 30
With all thy getting, get understanding
Solomon was really on to something. He really had everything mortal man could want in the physical world. Money, fame, power, women, properties, children (this one's a bit iffy. And yet his knowledge that all that is nothing without understanding (or wisdom, as some translations have it), is really mind boggling.
In a time when so much of what we do seems to be based on how we feel, rather than what we know, I am reminded that wisdom to sift the wheat from the chaff is indeed the most valuable thing of all.
So much is relative, so much is measured on the level of pure emotion, that it is easy to look track of what's real and go with the flow. I am thankful for reminders everyday.
I know this is kinda rambling and random, but I needed to remember I said this.
In a time when so much of what we do seems to be based on how we feel, rather than what we know, I am reminded that wisdom to sift the wheat from the chaff is indeed the most valuable thing of all.
So much is relative, so much is measured on the level of pure emotion, that it is easy to look track of what's real and go with the flow. I am thankful for reminders everyday.
I know this is kinda rambling and random, but I needed to remember I said this.
Wednesday, July 29
Theatre Review: Shakespeare - Reduced and Riotous
I went to the opening night performance by the Reduced Shakespeare Company last night with my friend-in-all-things-literary. The complete works of Shakespeare - Abridged, performed in 97 minutes. All 37 plays, some sonnets, some aprocryphal works and a whole lot of physical comedy, innuendo, quote massacre,puns and play-on-words thrown in.
While most of the plays were mainly touch and go,(All the comedies were lumped together under a skit titled "4 weddings and a tranvestite"), the entire second half was devoted to what is considered Shakespeare's greatest work of all time. (And if you have to ask which one, tch).
The most enjoyable was the incredible versality of the actors, whose multiple talents really kept you guessing at what they are going to come up with next. Adding relevancy with references to popular culture (who hasn't used wiki or google to research eh?), the performance reminded us of the Bard's innate talents as well as his absolute verbosity, his penchant to "distil" other people's works and to pair the most unlikely couples in his many plays (many of whom can be married in various states in the US, as astutuely observed by the players).
If you are planning to watch this, you are in for the laugh of your life. I can't remember the last time I saw the aforementioned partner in crime laugh so hard or lose it so badly.
If you weren't planning to watch this, let me assure you that dont need a knowledge of Shakesepeare's work to enjoy it. Go. Now.
Till 2 August 2009
Drama Centre
Tickets from $19 at Sistic.
While most of the plays were mainly touch and go,(All the comedies were lumped together under a skit titled "4 weddings and a tranvestite"), the entire second half was devoted to what is considered Shakespeare's greatest work of all time. (And if you have to ask which one, tch).
The most enjoyable was the incredible versality of the actors, whose multiple talents really kept you guessing at what they are going to come up with next. Adding relevancy with references to popular culture (who hasn't used wiki or google to research eh?), the performance reminded us of the Bard's innate talents as well as his absolute verbosity, his penchant to "distil" other people's works and to pair the most unlikely couples in his many plays (many of whom can be married in various states in the US, as astutuely observed by the players).
If you are planning to watch this, you are in for the laugh of your life. I can't remember the last time I saw the aforementioned partner in crime laugh so hard or lose it so badly.
If you weren't planning to watch this, let me assure you that dont need a knowledge of Shakesepeare's work to enjoy it. Go. Now.
Till 2 August 2009
Drama Centre
Tickets from $19 at Sistic.
Tuesday, July 28
Resolve or Dissolve
Dinner with PKH yesterday was good for my sense of sensibility and perspective. Being the intense, analytical, very logical and feet firmly on the ground kinda person that he is, his views on almost everything are about 180 degrees removed form mine. Which is why I enjoy our friendship so much.
His take on the whole resolve or dissolve dilemma was at total odds to all my previously held opinions on the subject. When someone steps out of character and does something that shows initiative and a desire to communicate, is that reason to celebrate the effort or use it to make my case against why he cannot be trusted.
Food for thought.
His take on the whole resolve or dissolve dilemma was at total odds to all my previously held opinions on the subject. When someone steps out of character and does something that shows initiative and a desire to communicate, is that reason to celebrate the effort or use it to make my case against why he cannot be trusted.
Food for thought.
Saturday, July 25
Bob Blumer - An encounter
Last Saturday, I was blessed with the opportunity to attend a cooking class hosted by Bob Blumer, one of my Discovery Travel and Living heroes. Bob hosted a really cute show called Surreal Gourmet, where he travelled around toaster-mobile in his cooking extaordinary meals for the most unlikely people, with the simplest ingredients. Bob has a great sense of humour, and his passionate for food, coupled with the cute Canadian way he says "aboot" instead of "about" makes him very likeable indeed.
The class was a blast! There were perhaps 30 of us in all, contest winners, food bloggers and other calefare i.e me. He was in town to promote his new show "glutton for punishment" which almost killed him, to hear him tell it. Although he looked really tired, he was most obliging with our incessant requests for photo opps, autographs and dumb questions (can I use oil instead of butter?) He had just come from Manila and was leaving for KL the next day and I was surprised he wasn't more grumpy.
Bob taught us how to make chicken on a stick, prawns on a stick and chocolate wontons (not on a stick). The food was amazing, but it paled in comparision to meeting a prolebrity (professional celebrity?).
The good people at Discovery did a bang up job organising this, and gave us nice freebies like a awesome apron and a Glutton for Punishment Coffee Cup with cover/cookie plate. I love it!
It was an awesome experience. Thanks S for asking me to go and thank you God, for making it possible.
PS Photos later. For some reason blogger won't let me post photos at the mo.
The class was a blast! There were perhaps 30 of us in all, contest winners, food bloggers and other calefare i.e me. He was in town to promote his new show "glutton for punishment" which almost killed him, to hear him tell it. Although he looked really tired, he was most obliging with our incessant requests for photo opps, autographs and dumb questions (can I use oil instead of butter?) He had just come from Manila and was leaving for KL the next day and I was surprised he wasn't more grumpy.
Bob taught us how to make chicken on a stick, prawns on a stick and chocolate wontons (not on a stick). The food was amazing, but it paled in comparision to meeting a prolebrity (professional celebrity?).
The good people at Discovery did a bang up job organising this, and gave us nice freebies like a awesome apron and a Glutton for Punishment Coffee Cup with cover/cookie plate. I love it!
It was an awesome experience. Thanks S for asking me to go and thank you God, for making it possible.
PS Photos later. For some reason blogger won't let me post photos at the mo.
Thursday, July 23
What this woman wants - really
I had a good talk with an old friend yesterday (has it really been 10 years?!) and we spoke of many things. Then he asked me a question which really floored me.
What do you want, he said, all serious.
I hadn't thought about what I wanted in such a long time then I was completely bewildered for a while. What DO I want? Then I started thinking, what if what i want is too superficial, too shallow, too minor? Does it then make it something not worth wanting, or even worth having?
It's something I am still pondering. Who knew such a simple question would be so hard to answer.
What do you want, he said, all serious.
I hadn't thought about what I wanted in such a long time then I was completely bewildered for a while. What DO I want? Then I started thinking, what if what i want is too superficial, too shallow, too minor? Does it then make it something not worth wanting, or even worth having?
It's something I am still pondering. Who knew such a simple question would be so hard to answer.
Monday, July 13
Tuesday, June 30
Back to school!
The last 2 weeks of the school holidays were just packed! Birthday celebrations, trips to Malacca, church camp and endless other feasts and festivities filled our days.
Needless to say, waking up this morning at the glorious time of 5:45a, was a drag. Surprisingly enough, Hanan bounded out of bed rather quickly and was not too cranky about my hurrying him through the shower, dressing and shoes-and-socks stage.
After he left, I went to bed but instead of sleeping, found myself praying for the many things on my mind. Michael Jackson's demise. My friend's dad's operation. My ability to get through the next ten weeks of term and emerge sane. My seasons of self-pity and loneliness.
It's a whole bunch of depressing stuff, but at the end of it, I actually felt stronger and more confident than I had in quite a while. Strange, no? Or maybe not.
Needless to say, waking up this morning at the glorious time of 5:45a, was a drag. Surprisingly enough, Hanan bounded out of bed rather quickly and was not too cranky about my hurrying him through the shower, dressing and shoes-and-socks stage.
After he left, I went to bed but instead of sleeping, found myself praying for the many things on my mind. Michael Jackson's demise. My friend's dad's operation. My ability to get through the next ten weeks of term and emerge sane. My seasons of self-pity and loneliness.
It's a whole bunch of depressing stuff, but at the end of it, I actually felt stronger and more confident than I had in quite a while. Strange, no? Or maybe not.
Thursday, June 11
First Birthday Thing
My department people at work took me to birthday lunch today. We had Japanese, as my request, which is one of my favourites (among the other 15 types of cuisine which are my favourite. Ok, I like food.)
It was really fun, especially trying everybody's food, making fun of each other and generally continuing the asinine mayhem that goes on in the office anyway.
And I got really nice presents, including a "hot babe" tag. Finally, the recognition for who I really am :)
Happy already!
Some photos. I won't ruin your pleasant bewilderment with captions.
It was really fun, especially trying everybody's food, making fun of each other and generally continuing the asinine mayhem that goes on in the office anyway.
And I got really nice presents, including a "hot babe" tag. Finally, the recognition for who I really am :)
Happy already!
Some photos. I won't ruin your pleasant bewilderment with captions.
Tuesday, June 9
Oven
I have been hankering for an oven recently, after throwing out my old decrepit one in December along with a whole bunch of other kitchen junk i no longer needed.
It's funny that I haven't felt the need for one till recently when the plethora of good recipes on www.foodgawker.com have made me want to grill and bake again.
So, through an angel who will remain unnamed I got this Moulinex Compact Chef Oven for a very afforable price. Well this is not the exact thing, but it looks something like this.
And now, I realise that I need to get all the peripherals that go with it - cookie sheets, cake pans, muffin pans, stoneware, etc etc...
This is gonna be fun! And just in time too.
It's funny that I haven't felt the need for one till recently when the plethora of good recipes on www.foodgawker.com have made me want to grill and bake again.
So, through an angel who will remain unnamed I got this Moulinex Compact Chef Oven for a very afforable price. Well this is not the exact thing, but it looks something like this.
And now, I realise that I need to get all the peripherals that go with it - cookie sheets, cake pans, muffin pans, stoneware, etc etc...
This is gonna be fun! And just in time too.
Friday, June 5
Singing in "Indian"
On Page 39 of Thursday's Today newspaper, a very popular, iconic SINGAPOREAN musician was quoted as saying,
"We once did a Chinese song... done as a ballad with Indian instruments and sung in Indian."
Every Indian nerve in my body prickled and stood on end at those last three words. Sung in Indian?
How do people who have lived in a multi-racial society like Singapore, have friends of different ethnicity (one would assume) and have written and performed in all 4 official languages not know that "Indian" is not a language?
I can understand if the person grew up at the bottom of a well, is a SAP school alumni and local university graduate whose only contact with other races is when they are feeling exotic and want to eat prata. But this person is a much respected cultural icon, who honestly should know better.
So, to clear it up, here is the low-down:
Indian is a nationality.
A Hindu is person who practises Hinduism, a religion.
Hindi is a language.
The Indian language that is also our official language is Tamil.
Tamil is spoken by 90% of Singaporeans of Indian descent.
Tamils are not classified by how "fair" or "dark" they are, but where their forefathers came from (Tamil Nadu and some parts of Kerala and Sri Lanka)
And for the record, we are not amused when you imitate our language and ask non-enligtened questions like "Wah, you perm your hair ah?"
It is as impossible to sing in Indian, as it is to order food in Malaysian or speak in Singaporean.
To the respected musician in question, I really do hope that you were misquoted. It is unforgivable for a person such as yourself, who borrows freely from our vast cultural heritage to make such an ignorant comment.
"We once did a Chinese song... done as a ballad with Indian instruments and sung in Indian."
Every Indian nerve in my body prickled and stood on end at those last three words. Sung in Indian?
How do people who have lived in a multi-racial society like Singapore, have friends of different ethnicity (one would assume) and have written and performed in all 4 official languages not know that "Indian" is not a language?
I can understand if the person grew up at the bottom of a well, is a SAP school alumni and local university graduate whose only contact with other races is when they are feeling exotic and want to eat prata. But this person is a much respected cultural icon, who honestly should know better.
So, to clear it up, here is the low-down:
Indian is a nationality.
A Hindu is person who practises Hinduism, a religion.
Hindi is a language.
The Indian language that is also our official language is Tamil.
Tamil is spoken by 90% of Singaporeans of Indian descent.
Tamils are not classified by how "fair" or "dark" they are, but where their forefathers came from (Tamil Nadu and some parts of Kerala and Sri Lanka)
And for the record, we are not amused when you imitate our language and ask non-enligtened questions like "Wah, you perm your hair ah?"
It is as impossible to sing in Indian, as it is to order food in Malaysian or speak in Singaporean.
To the respected musician in question, I really do hope that you were misquoted. It is unforgivable for a person such as yourself, who borrows freely from our vast cultural heritage to make such an ignorant comment.
Thursday, June 4
Vignettes
Its been exactly 2 months since a certain someone got on a plane and left for the shores that welcomed the teeming masses. In a lot of ways, i guess its wierd not having him around. But in even more, it is actually quite good. No more arguments for the sake of arguments. And going home is a lot more plesant.
***
In 8 days, I will cross an important threshold and go into my late thirties. Ugh. That's a whole other checkbox on most survey forms. On the up side, I am more stable emotionally, secure financially and mature spiritually then I have ever been.
***
What do chocolate cake, baked rice, roast chicken and sugar cookies have in common?
They all need an oven to be prepared. And I don't have one. For some reason they cost an arm and a leg and the there aren't that many second hand ones for sale.
I need an oven. It will make me feel fulfilled as a woman in her late thirties. Well, maybe not. But that's my story and I am sticking with it.
***
Why do I sign myself up for stuff I don't have time to do? I just sorta kinda volunteered to be pretty heavily involved the production of the combined service. It started off with an innocuous idea which grew till I realised, wait, I am signing up for more work here.
But I guess I didn't really want to say no. Not to this anyway.
***
In 8 days, I will cross an important threshold and go into my late thirties. Ugh. That's a whole other checkbox on most survey forms. On the up side, I am more stable emotionally, secure financially and mature spiritually then I have ever been.
***
What do chocolate cake, baked rice, roast chicken and sugar cookies have in common?
They all need an oven to be prepared. And I don't have one. For some reason they cost an arm and a leg and the there aren't that many second hand ones for sale.
I need an oven. It will make me feel fulfilled as a woman in her late thirties. Well, maybe not. But that's my story and I am sticking with it.
***
Why do I sign myself up for stuff I don't have time to do? I just sorta kinda volunteered to be pretty heavily involved the production of the combined service. It started off with an innocuous idea which grew till I realised, wait, I am signing up for more work here.
But I guess I didn't really want to say no. Not to this anyway.
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