Wednesday, September 27

It's pure trash and I love it

Desperate Housewives is the most removed from reality show there is. Which makes for a welcome break from all the reality shows of course. But honestly,the amount of suspension of disbeleif required to sit through an episode is mindboggling.

1) There is no way there is such a large concentration of single, thin, rich white housewives in one neighbourhood. Especially when statistics show 1 in 4 American women is a lard ass.

2) Edie is however a reality. Every neighbourhood has one - the shameless hussy that throws herself at every man from 7 to 70. Mine lives on the 3rd floor and runs a door to door yakult selling business.

3) That level of family dysfunctionality is not based on any reality. Most families are way more dysfunctional than that. A household where a woman comes home and kisses her stay home husband? Please. Its all she can do to not look at him like the lazy good for nothing worm that he is. And a woman who sends her boyfriend's son to his death in UTAH, so she can keep the man at home? I know this is desperate housewives, but really, no woman is as heartless as that. We are more likely to lie and connive and turn the man against his own son, so he will send him to UTAH to his death.

4)Children are nuts. Its a fact. Deal with it. Don't trust in time outs, bribes, negotiation or cajoling. You are bigger. Use brute force. The end. One day they will thank you for not allowing them to kill themselves when they were 5. The no-hitting-chldren rule is the biggest, most crippling lie the devil ever told us.

NB: I am not talking about abuse here. I am saying there is a place for capital discipline.

5) If ever a neighbour moves in next door, and you hear weird sounds coming from their basement, don't ignore them. Call the police.

I love desperate housewives. All that eye candy is a definite plus (men included) but the best thing about it is how you can totally remove yourself from reality for one hour. And really appreciate your comparitively normal life once the hour is up.

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