A Message to Indian Expats

Recent events have gotten me so riled against this particular group of people that I have to give vent to my feelings here before I explode and say something I might regret to their faces.

Dear Indian Expat,
1) you are not smarter than me. Sure, you may have a whole string of alphabets behind your name that your father bought from whichever corrupt univerisity you call your Alma Mater, but that doesn't make you smarter. The only reason you were hired for the job is because no self respecting Singaporean will do that kind of work for that little. In case you didn't know, even peanuts in SIngapore is 6 figures per annum.

2) Keep your food morality to yourself. I am really not interested in hearing how meat is bad for you, and how the rancid curd rice your wife packs for you in the morning is so much healthier than food at the hawker centre. In fact we are actually happy you prefer your puke-inducing yesterday's sambar, so that we don't have to jostle with you for space during lunch.

3) Teach your children some manners. Granted, children only ape the way their parents behave, and we all know how petulant some of you are. But it is NOT acceptable for your kids to be running into people while playing on the train while their mothers sit there and compare the designs on one another's jewellery.

4)Singaporean women are not dying to meet Indian expat men. So stop looking at us like we are. We like our men strong, physically fit, independant and manly, the way Singaporean men who have been through NS are. Not interested in soft in the middle, pansy walking, limp wristed men who lived with their mother and a retinue of servants till they got married.

5) Singaporean Indians have risen above petty differentiators like religion, sect, caste and clan. It is no longer an acceptable conversation starter. So don't think we should fall down and worship you just because you know which caste you belong to. People who cling to age old clan and caste traditions are people who have such low self esteem that they have to hold on to whatever history they can find to validate their existence. Singaporeans are alot more secure than that.


Of course, I acknowledge that there are Indian expats who do not deserve this rant and are actually decent human beings. You are hence tasked to teach your countrymen the dos and don'ts of living in someone else's country. Please. Do us all a favour.